Diwali brings in so many memories. The last few Diwalis have
been bitter-sweet.
Kids looking forward to the new clothes, the sparklers,
meeting friends and family, and I remembering my childhood, my Appa.
Every Deebavali (that’s what Tamilians call it), Appa would
wake us up at 4:00 AM to burst some crackers to commemorate the death of the
evil Narakasura.
Appa would insist that we take an oil bath – apply oil on
our head and body, and shower with a few drops of the Holy Ganga mixed with
our bucket of water.
“Ganga snanam aayacha?" was the standard
way Appa and Amma would greet friends and family to wish Happy Deebavali. “Did
you take your bath with the Holy water.”
We used to hate waking up so early, but bursting the crackers,
Amma rubbing oil on our heads and us taking our baths and accepting our new
clothes whilst sitting on our old clothes in gratitude, are all traditions etched in my
memory.
My kids also have developed their own memories. They know to
expect Indian sweets, chaat, new clothes and crackers. But I don’t wake them up
at 4:00 AM or rush them to take an oil bath. There’s a chance I don’t do this because
I don’t like waking up so early, but also because my kids are more vocal in
expressing their dissatisfaction with the situation than my sis and I ever
were.
Nevertheless, the smell of freshly made delicacies, the
laughter of the kids, M.S. Subbulaxmi in the background, reminds me so much of
Appa doing puja in the morning, Amma by his side. I miss doing namaskaram to him
before accepting our new clothes. I miss getting the prasadam from him, before
he offered an entire plate of Deebavali foods, I miss giving both my sis and I a warm hug and wishing us the best in everything we did.
Appa, I wish you were with us; I wish you would spread the cheer of festivities
like you always did. I wish you held my children and gave them a warm, loving embrace
like you always did to us. I wish I could have so many more Deebavalis with
you. I hope you had your Ganga Snanam ‘pa.
