A little bit of me, a little bit of you

When we realized that I was pregnant with DS, we decided to announce it through a scavenger hunt to DD. She loves solving puzzles, and she was the one who lobbied non-stop for a younger sibling, so she deserved to know the news as soon as we did.

I crafted 10 different puzzles, and she scavenged through the entire house to solve it.

The last clue said “You will no longer be just you, you’ll now have a different role, a different relationship, and a different responsibility. You will be the older one, not the only one.”

“Only child?” she instantly remarked. “I won’t be the only child anymore?”

We smiled.

“Are you pregnant?” she came running to touch my belly.

“Yes, sweetheart” I said.

“Yay, I am going to become a big sister! When will my little sister come?”

“We don’t know if it’ll be a little sister or a little brother” Ady said. “But whichever one, you’ll still be the older sister.”

“Yeah” she agreed. “But little sister means, we’ll have a lot of pink.”

“I am so happy, mamma”, she continued hugging me. “I will no longer be the only kid in school without a sibling. I will have my own sibling.”

“Yes”, I said. “You most definitely will not be the only kid anymore. You’ll be Akka” I said.

“Or Didi”, Ady quickly added.

“So the baby won’t call me by my name?” she asked.

“Well, the baby will be the only one who can call you ‘big sister’, and mean it because they’ll be related to you by blood. My sister calls me ‘Akka’, and papa calls his sister ‘Didi’”, I said.

“Hmm…I don’t mind the baby calling me by my name”, she pondered. “But having a special name sure sounds good.”

“How about…” she continued… “how about the baby call me Dika, or Akdi?”

“It’s a combination of Didi and Akka?” I asked.

“Yeah. So it’ll be a little bit of Tamil and a little bit of Hindi, because I am part Tamil and part Hindi.”

Ady and I smiled. We liked the idea. “I think Dika sounds good” we agreed.

And thus was born a newly coined relationship. It is very unique to what DS calls DD, and we like it that way  – A little bit of me, and a little bit of him.  

 

 

 Photo credit - Romel - https://www.flickr.com/photos/wolfsoul/2072332105

Doink!

 

DS loves traveling. He specifically likes traveling to resorts and vacation rentals where there are a ton of games, just like his dad.

I remember the time and effort Ady took when DS was about 3, to find a spot which has a lot of space to run around, and golf. While he wasn’t successful enough to find real golf, at the location we were going to, he settled for disc golf.

So as one would expect, we dropped our bags, explored the place, and set off to play a round of disc golf.

We made teams. Dad and daughter, mom and son.

For the initial 10 minutes, DS was observing how the game was being played. He saw his dad and sis throw the disc through the chain rack and wasn’t really comfortable with the sounds.

Soon, he understood the game, and said he was ready to play.

“OK, take positions” Ady ordered.

I stood right beside DS, so I could swoop down or capture the discs going above his head.  DD stood across from her dad to strategically throw the disc into the rack.

DS looked at me and paused. He yelled out to his dad, “Wait, wait. Don’t throw”

And then he took me by my hand and pulled me behind a tree.

“What are you doing?” I asked. “Why are you making me stand behind the tree?”

Noticing the move, Ady and DD also moved closer to us.

“The disc is very fast, mamma” DS explained. “It will be very hard when it hits. I don’t want you to get hurt. You’ll be safe behind the tree.”

My eyes welled up. Oh, what a lovely little boy.

DH was silent. I looked at him and smiled. He smiled back, then looked at DS – “What about me?” he demanded.

DD and I started laughing. Wonder who’s the dad and who’s the son!

 

Photo credit: https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/5/55/Disc_golf_-_Laajavuori.jpg

 

Long Live Tamil!

When it came to identity, DS somehow was very clear, that he had Indian heritage. He wanted to learn everything about India, - the language, the dances, songs.  The only exception to this was food - it was ok to avoid food that wasn't bland and idli shaped.

He wanted to learn Hindi. What more could a  parent ask for - a willing child who wants to learn more about his culture and his native language. So all that we had to do, was speak to him in Hindi. But of course we didn't. We were so used to speaking in English, that Hindi really, was an effort. Yes, please get judgmental.

But we had ourselves a persistent kid. He saw me learn Spanish on Duolingo, so he insisted I set him up for Hindi. He religiously did his Hindi lessons everyday, so much so that he was able to understand what we were speaking, and he responded in comprehensible words. 

We were really impressed that the kid, inspite of his lax parents was able to learn a foreign language. A little part of me was having the FOMO reaction because the kid wasn't learning Tamil. But I clearly couldn't ask for more. 

Fast forward to a few months, and PS-II had released. There is one song in particular, which literally praises Tamil culture and the Chola empire. I kept listening to it over and over. The pride for the language and the Cholan accomplishments was something my dad displayed a lot. He was a proud Tamilian. He, loved the language, the culture, and it's rich history. The song reminded me of him, and how he'd be beaming with pride. I kept listening, so I could hear him sing along. 

I must have heard  the song on repeat so many times, that as I was putting DS to bed one night, he asked me - "Mamma, why do you keep listening to the Veera Veera song?"

"Well, babe, it reminds me of Thatha a lot. The song is about the Tamil language, and I don't have anyone to talk to in Tamil, so I keep listening to it. It makes me very emotional. It makes me feel closer to Thatha and closer to Tamil."

There was a long pause, and then he said. "I feel sad that you can't talk to us in Tamil Mamma", I could hear him sniffle. "Does Duolingo have Tamil?  I want to learn it because it will make you happy."

I think my allergy has relapsed, my eyes are getting moist again. 

Image credit: https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Nixs_News_Tamil_Logo.png